I've learned something over the past few weeks and had some really great revelations. They all center around finding, pinpointing and becoming aware of weakness.
Weakness is something I've spent most of my life dodging. It's something that I've never wanted to look dead straight in the eye. I'd rather focus on what I'm good at and keep that as the center of my universe. And then if we really don't want to beat around the bush; I'm just plain prideful. I want to hide the things I'm not good at. I want to hide it from myself and others. Maybe my thinking is that if I hide it, it doesn't really exist. I'm not sure. What I am sure of is that way of living isn't helping me or anyone else in a positive way.
So now what to do with this big reality? I think step 2 is what I'm on right now. I'm becoming aware of my weaknesses, realizing that I don't walk on water and notice that it's a blessing to be aware of weakness because that's the only way to get stronger.
However, I think it's important and fascinating that I haven't beat myself up about my it. Maybe what I've been afraid of all along is the realization that it will feel really bad if I acknowledge it's there.
While I don't want to put all my focus on this I do want to know it's there so I can fix it. Ignoring it does no good.
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